Christine's Blog: How I'd Like to Respond to Bargain Hunters (5/7/07)
Christine reacts to a few of the inquiries that she received this week.
Hello Everyone!
It's bargain week for all the Karpinski vacation rentals—or at least that's what the renters seem to think. For some crazy reason, I'm getting inquiries for my places and the people want big bargains—and of course they want these deals for Memorial Day or Fourth of July.
While I have been known to bargain a little bit with my renters—knock off the cleaning fee, give one free night, etc. I do not rent my properties for deeply discounted prices. It's not worth my trouble!
I have to admit that that these inquiries make my blood pressure skyrocket; I have to stop myself from sending snide replies. Most often I simply reply with “Yes I do have those dates open; however, my advertised prices are firm.”
So, since I can't really respond to my renters like this, I'd like to share with you some quotes from some of the inquiries that I received this past week. The responses are thoughts that run through my head--but I would NEVER really respond this way:
“Would you rent for a total of $100 for these two nights including taxes and fees??”
Dear $100 for two nights,
I have a better idea—how about I pay YOU to rent my place. Because as soon as I pay the sales tax and the cleaning fee, that's what I'll be doing!
“We really can't afford to spend a lot, so if it is more than $700.00 forget it.”
Dear I really can't afford to spend a lot,
I really can't afford a Bugatti Veyron, but I am accustomed to sending complete total strangers a plea to help me buy luxury items. If you can't help me buy it, forget it. |
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“Can you rent the condo for $325? I really need a miracle I am desperate!”
Dear Desperate,
Yes you can pay $325 for my condo that rents for $2000 per week. What a great idea! I'm going to send a note to my mortgage company and see if they'll take $325 as my payment. If they say yes, I'll be granted a miracle too!
Please note: These are not real responses. This is merely a humorous rendition of my thoughts.
If you are offended by plea for an insultingly-low, deeply-discounted price, remember the words of your mom, "If you can't say anything nice, then it's best to say nothing at all."
Happy Renting by Owner!
Christine
If you're interested in hearing Christine speak at one of her upcoming seminars, visit the Seminar Schedule for more information.
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